I’ve been giving a lot of thought recently to what really are my ambitions about writing. How do I see my ideal life, a life which encompasses writing. Visualisation is a powerful tool, but often we send out mixed messages about what we’re really visualising. So, I ask myself what I really want.
I’m lucky in having a day job which encompasses my writing to a large extent.
Hang on a minute? Am I lucky? Or did I create that through visualisation?
Interestingly, there is a lot that is good about my job – it recognises my writing as valid and important and it allows me to actually spend much of my time thinking and talking about writing to others. In fact, I’m expected to carry on honing my own skills and increasing my own knowledge and pass that on to others. I’m paid a reasonable wage for this and one could almost look upon it as a type of retainer.
I earn some money directly from my writing and there is also some writing I consider important though it is not commercial enough to earn me much. I manage to spend what feels like the right amount of my time on my writing and not too much on doing things I don’t want to do, including what I name “jobbing writing”. I’d like to shrink the latter two further.
I’d like to earn a little more. I’m not greedy in terms of material items. I actually don’t enjoy so-called “retail therapy” – it’s not a patch on writing. I find it hard to imagine my ideal living conditions, though I do have my eyes on a house around the corner from where I’m currently living. I’d like to feel comfortable enough to not struggle at the end of the month and to be able to visit my children and treat them a little but not too much without major planning involved. I certainly always want to be warm enough and have enough good food to eat, and to be able to buy ink, paper and new computers as needed as well as all the books and postage I require.
I want the writing itself to carry on getting better and better. I want it to always earn the amount of time I can give it.
It’s a tricky dream to hold on to, because it’s actually quite hard to put it into words – even for a writer.